I have been wishing to write this post for a very long time. But I wasn't in a good place. It was a dark vacuity created out of pain and despair. Today, it is bright. I have realised, it's not worth living the rest of my life being bitter and holding on to grudges.
The marriage broke down because it was needed. It was needed for the two of us to evolve, break out of the co-dependency and upgrade ourselves. Couldn't we have done all that while being together? No. There was a gross imbalance. One of the two needed to be the martyr. But none of us wanted it so the marriage took the blow. Communication was always unclear and the thousands of miles in between made the hearts wary. Other things just acted as catalysts in the destruction that was inevitable from day one.
Now that the analysis of the destruction is over, let me get to the good things this brought to me. I got to love someone unrestrained, the way I had always wanted to. Being able to do that in itself is a blessing and when it is reciprocated, whatever fraction of it, it's almost divine. I'm grateful for that. The brief companionship was good.
I'll remember him as a gentle person. May he find material abundance and success always.
Now, this seems like the perfect last adieu. I can picture myself closing a book, dazed with the intensity of the written words, assimilating the emotions provoked. A book that needn't be re-read.
